The Journey Girl Blog

#Warning!...8-Warning Signs for Parents of Teens in Abusive Relationships

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Sun, 19 Feb 2012 20:47:59 GMT

Do You See the Signs?

8-Warning Signs for Parents of Teens in Abusive Relationships

After recently reading a very disturbing article in Essence Magazine (A Dangerous Kind of Love, February 2012 issue) on a victim of a fatally abusive teenage relationship (15-year old Ortralla Mosley was murdered by her boyfriend), it started to make me think…How many more stories are out there that are not being told? How many more young lives are at stake for the sake of “love” (or as my mother used to call it, ‘puppy love’)? Even more, are parents even remotely aware of how severe this issue is for teen girls and parents around the world?

Teens committing suicide, dropping out of school early/before graduation, making bad grades at school, behavioral issues, problems/issues/troubles at home with parents, an increasingly high teenage pregnancy rate (and growing), fights in and out of the classroom over boys (and girls). When does the madness END???...Only when parents start to take notice and become MORE involved in the lives of their teens (even if there is a BIG emotional sign that reads ’KEEP OUT!’)

The topic of teens in abusive relationships is enough to make a parent’s skin crawl. It should also make moms and dads everywhere stop and think about their relationship with their teens and if they have noticed any of the following warning signs lately. Strange behavior in a teen can be linked to a relationship gone bad. Seeing the signs early-on, like with many severe issues, may be the difference between life and death.

The Signs:

1 – She may not be as open with you about her relationship as she may wish to be. It’s always good to ask questions.

2 – Notice any bruising. Seek outside help IMMEDIATELY. Seek a source of higher authority than your own. They are the ones with the power to make the greatest difference regarding the situation.

3 – She may no longer wish to hang out with friends. She may shut down and wish to communicate with the abuser only.

4 – She may make excuses for the abusive behavior.

5 – Journal or diary entries may speak more freely of her true feelings.

6 – She feels that her life is impossible, and cannot go on without the relationship. She may have thoughts of suicide or physically harming herself or someone else.

7 – She may make life-altering decisions (i.e – running away from home, attempting to get pregnant, moving in with the boyfriend/attempting to make life-ling plans with the boyfriend – dropping out of school, etc.)

8 – She may show signs of low self-esteem, thinking that she is of no good to anyone but her abuser.

Seek additional information from these other helpful resources:

www.loveisnotabuse.com to find information about warning signs + an app for dating abuse

www.loveisrespect.org includes a FREE help line at 1-866-331-9474 + online chat with peers

Forestville Pregnancy Center ("Empowering Women for Life")

For more information on the story of Ortralla Mosley visit www.ortrallafoundation.org

This information brought to you by:
© 2011 Journey Girl

Andrieka “AJ” Austin; Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org, voice of www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com, Founder and Facilitator of Journey Girl; specializing in female self-emPOWERment programming and resources for girls and women. See her work online at www.journeygirl.org. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Become a fan at www.facebook.com/journeygirlatlanta.
Tweet @journeygirlatl a mobile youth enrichment service for girls.

© 2011 Journey Girl

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

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#Finding #Kind

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 21:07:43 GMT

Watch the Movie Trailer Here

Find a Screening In Your Area:

http://findingkind.indieflix.com/movie/

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www.twitter.com/journeygirlatl

www.youtube.com/journeygirlatlanta, www.myspace.com/journeygirlatlanta

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Ask Journey Girl...

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Sun, 20 Nov 2011 17:19:18 GMT

Situation: "Two friends that I hang out with have their periods. My best friend just started her's a few days ago, and my other friend started her's a few years ago. Now they both act like I'm "babyish", and my best friend rolled her eyes at me and laughed when I told her that I felt left out. The girls who have started their periods act like they're in a special club, and there seems to be a new bond that I don't get to share in between my best friend and the others. My mom can't help me. She actually began her's first too."

-Feeling Left Out, age: 11

Journey Girl: Dear 'Feeling Left Out'. It's a common thing for a group of friends to begin the 'journey' of starting their periods (aka menstrual cycle) at different times. Everyone's body cycle is different. This does not mean that you should feel weird, left out, or babyish. Some girls' bodies begin this process earlier than others, and this could even be linked to genetics (passed down from moms and grand moms). So, don't feel like an outsider. There is no "special club". Try to talk with your friends about what really goes on during the menstrual period (for example: acne/pimples, cramps, bloating (gas), feeling tried and sleepy, etc.) If they are honest with you, they would say that they are the one's who are missing out not having to be concerned with what to do once their 'monthly visitor' shows up unexpectedly, like during a class or on a special day. Be patient, and know that your time will come. Once your body starts this cycle, this is something that will occur each month for years to come. In the long run, this is a process that you will be glad took so long to get here.

-Journey Girl

P.S. - I recommend checking out this GREAT book on how to take care of your body as it changes! (See if it's available at your school or community library)

This information brought to you by:

Andrieka “AJ” Austin; Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org, voice ofjourneygirlatl.wordpress.com, Founder and Facilitator of Journey Girl, a mobile youth enrichment service for girls. Visit us online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org, enter your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails when new blog topics are posted.

Image: kidshealth.org

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NEW Book to Teen Girl EmPOWERment

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Sun, 20 Nov 2011 15:44:15 GMT

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Pieces of Peace (The International Feature)

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 22:48:13 GMT

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R-O-O-T-S to F-R-U-I-T-S (International Feature)

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 22:43:49 GMT

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The Journey Girl Guide to Teen Self-EmPOWERment Book Release Party!!!

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Wed, 21 Sep 2011 15:56:52 GMT

Journey Girl is EXCITED to be hosting the first Atlanta-based Book Release Party for Author, Andrieka J. Austin's new book The Journey Girl Guide to Teen Self-EmPOWERment; Girl-friendly TIps, Tools, and Tidbits on Friday, November 11, 2011 at 6:00pm. The Journey Girl Guide focuses on snippets of helpful information for today's teenage girl.

Ms. Andrieka "AJ" Austin is Founder of Journey Girl (www.journeygirl.org), a mobile enrichment service for girls and women that offers self-emPOWERment and life-skills enhancing strategies and techniques for living a successfully emPOWERed life.

Her Atlanta-based business offers workshops, training, and consulting services to schools, corporate and social services agencies, professional women’s groups, juvenile justice systems, parents, and non-profit youth groups and organizations around the world.

With a professional background in corporate services, youth services and advocacy, she is committed to positively impacting the lives of girls and women everywhere. She has a deep passion to “encourage…empower…and entertain” girls and women around the world through the Journey Girl initiative. Her personal mission is to guide girls and women on a journey to being disciplined, dynamic, and socially conscious citizens.

The Launch Party...

Self-EmPOWERment Expert and Author, Andrieka "AJ" Austin will speak on helping young people learn the key ingredients to self-emPOWERment, including Finding a Mentor, Social Networking, Discovering their own God-given talents and gifts, dealing with Peer Pressures, and Standing Up to Bullies – very important information for students, teens, and parents of teens!

To RSVP e-mail book@journeygirl.org or call 770.744.GIRL [4475] by Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Cost: $20 per person
includes...

-talk with GREAT girl-friendly tips, tools, and tidbits of information

-great-tasting tapas

-one signed copy of the NEW book, The Journey Girl Guide to Teen Self-EmPOWERment; Girl-friendly Tips, Tools, and Tidbits

-a post event private chat about some of the issues parents with teens are facing today (and how to help them become emPOWERed)

**Books are available for pre-order online at www.journeygirl.org**

Project Praise for The Journey Girl Guide...

"The conversational, 'easy- to- read style' in which this book is written makes it a useful tool for teenage girls everywhere. The Journey Girl Guide to Teen Self-Empowerment; Girl-friendly Tips, Tools and Tidbits addresses important topics that many teenage girls face and provides them with concise, meaningful and relevant advice. This book is a must read for teenage girls everywhere." -Myya D. Mixon, Co-Owner, Diamond All-Stars Cheerleading

"This articulately written self-empowerment book for young ladies far surpasses any of its kind. The honest transparency with which Ms. Austin addresses young ladies speaks to her undeniable passion for what she does. Her heart is to have every girl look into the mirror and truly love what she sees. In order for this to take place in a girl's life, Ms. Austin expertly addresses the need for self-respect. She encourages young ladies to think deeply about what they "love, respect and value most" about themselves in order to discover their own self worth and significance.

As a mother of two young girls, I am convinced that this book will be of great value to any preteen and teenager, and it is an excellent tool for mothers to use as discussion points with their daughters as well. I have personally been an avid fan of Ms. Austin's dedication to young women, and applaud her efforts in this book. I assure you that this masterpiece, The Journey Girl Guide to Teen Self-Empowerment; Girl-friendly Tips, Tools and Tidbits will not disappoint! It is highly recommended! Kudos, Journey Girl!!!" -Karlene Hamilton-McPherson, Author of "Sela"

Readers Rave...

"Entertainment paired with education, this book is a perfect tool for young ladies seeking to improve, understand and control their journey through life."

"Informative, inspiring and entertaining, the Journey Girl Guide is a must have for teen girls today."

"This book provides an epic tutorial for femininity and empowerment!"

- Tanisha N. Bolden, Author of This Is Why I ROCK: A Self-Empowerment Journal for Youth

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What I Know for Sure!

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Wed, 21 Sep 2011 13:54:06 GMT

A |What I Know for Sure

“You have everything you need to succeed.”

-Pastor William H. Murphy, III

Life is often found to be a challenge for most people. Coming up in a home with little to no access to material things can make one doubt what his or her very existence is all about. But, not to worry. One of the most motivational and memorable messages from a sermon that I can remember came from the following seven words, “You have everything you need to succeed.”

These quoted words were (and still are) music to my ears, and have since stuck like glue to my heart. Once you get to a place in your life where you can stop, be still, listen, and most of all, take a good look around you, you will find this statement to be true to its very core. Whether in natural or spiritual possessions, you will always have what it takes to make it.

© 2011 Journey Girl
This information brought to you by:

Visit us online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org, enter your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails when new blog topics are posted.

Image: Professional photos provided by G-14 for the Studio Concept, Make-up by Sean "B. Breezy" Mac (Atlanta, GA)

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S.H.A.P.E - Spiritial Gift---Heart---Abilities---Purpose---Experience

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Fri, 02 Sep 2011 13:30:07 GMT

SHAPE
Spiritial Gift---Heart---Abilities---Purpose---Experience

The shape we behold as woman is a gift that God has blessed us to have. It's our personal blessing from God to serve Him and encourage others through different ministries that we are specifically designed for. We possess pure hearts because we truly seek to understand our purpose in the Kingdom of God.

Our 1st nature is to nurture and the virtue of just being a woman is a true ability to do a work for God. Our hearts hold the passion of lioness. As Queens we have the finesse to finesse everything within and beyond our reach even our speech is unique. It shows character and personality which is as sweet as the morning sun.

The glow of a woman is her own and she can go on in the midst of a storm with the grace of a ballerina even a storm as fierce as KATRINA can't break her spirit because she dances her way through a trial and she can still walk a mile in stilettos and when her her feet begin to burn and her toes began to ache there is still enough strength to hold up her SHAPE.

She can work, keep house, take care of the babies, and be the helpmate that she is called to be. A phenomenal being she is:A WOMAN that is.... Great in all that she does for her experience is knowledge earned and she yearns to speak life into your spirit to uplift you at all times. Her time is not wasted because she shows patience with added peace.

Watch out because when she falls down on her knees there is a breakthrough in her shout and praise. Her days are loaded with benefits from all the seeds that's she has sewn into good soil so worthy to be spoiled she doesn't spoil or taint her accomplishments with a vain attitude. The fertile seeds are a harvest of perfection because her complexion is a shadow without being gray of God's perfection.

WOW! Look at that reflection in the mirror! Compliment her on her courage simply because she walks in a spirit of excellence that flourishes or shall I say SHAPED into a divine creature that God molded and formed with his own hands and that my sisters is the true SHAPE of a woman.

Featured Guest Blogger:

Author: Nola Only

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© 2011 Journey Girl
This information brought to you by:

Visit us online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org, enter your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails when new blog topics are posted.

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Your Gifts...Your Talents!

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Wed, 24 Aug 2011 16:57:42 GMT

Your Gifts...Your Talents!

Recently, while out in my local community, I met a young lady in one
of the most peculiar ways...through, by, and because of her talent!
She and I were sitting side-by-side on our computers. She was silent.
I was silent. But HER talent spoke LOUDLY and BOLDLY to me.

I usually pride myself on my typing skills (I think I can type fast!),
but she was MUCH faster (and I dare say, better) than me on the
"keys"! Just by looking, you would not have known that we were in
competition with each other. But, if you listened, you would have
heard us at WAR! It was all about WHO could type the fastest!
(Hilarious!!)

Little did she know, that I was recruiting and "scouting" new talent
to be a part of the famous Journey Girl V.I.P (Volunteer Internship
Program) Team, and she was now on my radar! We battled it out on the
keyboards for most of the work day, still no words were spoken. Our
fingers clinging FIERCELY on those keys said EVERYTHING that needed to
be said .

A day or so went past since the first encounter, and we recently
crossed paths again. This time I spoke, introduced myself, and we
LAUGHED about our first meeting. We mentioned how we had noticed each
other's gift and speed at typing (she confessed that she couldn't let
me "out do" her!)

Needless to say, she is now one of the NEWEST Journey Girl V.I.Ps for
the Fall session!

This story stood out to me, because in my new book, "The Journey Girl
Guide to Teen Self-EmPOWERment", I mention getting involved with
internships, volunteering/community service, finding a mentor to help
you reach your future goals, and discovering your gifts and talents.
Unknown to her, this young lady did ALL of these all at the same time,
and all in ONE day's sitting!

I commend her for her typing skills, and PROUDLY say, "Welcome to the
Journey Girl family!" I look forward to continuing to grow my team of
great talent and phenomenal leaders with resources of emPOWERment to
help positively impact the lives of girls and women worldwide!

-Journey Girl

© 2011 Journey Girl
This information brought to you by:

Andrieka “AJ” Austin; Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org, voice of journeygirlatl.wordpress.com, Founder and Facilitator of Journey Girl, a mobile youth enrichment service for girls. Visit us online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org, enter your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails when new blog topics are posted.

Image: practicallyintuitive.com

See Us Online:
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Top (12)Tips for Better Self-emPOWERment

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Mon, 08 Aug 2011 14:54:43 GMT

Top (12)Tips for Better Self-emPOWERment

(1) DECIDE to clear your mind from self-doubt

(2) Clear your mental space from all old, past thoughts and hurtful memories (this is "dead weight", and can be heavy and mentally draining

(3) Secure your present environment with emPOWERing tools like (positive books, CDs, tapes, magazines, websites, tv shows, etc.)

(4) Evaluate friendships and current relationships to determine their effectiveness (to sow, to grow, to GO (end)

(5) Learn to take the GOOD from the bad (NO MATTER WHAT!) -- make ALL situations POSITIVE

(6) Practice these tips daily!

(7) DO NOT allow anyone to change your position or your mindset

(8) NEVER give away your JOY!

(9) Dispose of anything (tangible or intangible) that will contaminate your emPOWERed state of mind

(10) Share these tips with a friend (and hold each other accountable) - they will THANK You!

(11) Continue to seek out professional services like Journey Girl to help grow and expand your self-emPOWERment and life skills practices.

(12) And most of all, make self-emPOWERment a top priority I you'll ALWAYS have YOUrself to thank!

© 2011 Journey Girl
This information brought to you by:

Andrieka “AJ” Austin; Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org, voice of journeygirlatl.wordpress.com, Founder and Facilitator of Journey Girl, a mobile youth enrichment service for girls. Visit us online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org, enter your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails when new blog topics are posted.

Image: practicallyintuitive.com

See Us Online:
www.facebook.com/journeygirlatl
www.twitter.com/journeygirlatl
www.youtube.com/journeygirlatlanta
www.myspace.com/journeygirlatlanta

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Note to Parents: (10) Things Your Teen(s) WISH You Knew About Them...

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Wed, 20 Jul 2011 23:39:44 GMT

Note to Parents: (10) Things Your Teen(s) WISH You Knew About Them...

(1) It's easier to open up and talk to you when their thoughts and
feelings are being considered too.

(2) Your words and conversation(s) mean so much more to them when their words or ideas are NOT 'shot down' or dismissed.

(3) They REALLY appreciate your OPENness and complete HONESTY with them about YOUr experience(s) as a teenager.

(4) NO ONE likes to be judged.

(5) Instead of ignoring how they feel, try listening and acknowledging them with a simply head shake of agreement.

(6) Sometimes, they just want to be HEARD...if ONLY you would LISTEN...(YOU have a BETTER chance at being heard once they feel that THEY are being heard too!)

(7) Understand that you CAN'T take away ALL of life's pain (even though you have the BEST intentions to try)

(8) Trust in the VALUES that you have already taught them. Trust and allow them to make the BEST decision(s) for themselves.

(9) Your views of REALity may sometimes differ (and that's OKAY)...we ALL have to learn sometime!

(10) It is COMFORTing to know that you'll always be there with LOVE and OPEN arms (no matter what).

At Journey Girl, our goal is to present methods of communication that can lead to more satisfying relationships between parents and teens. As a parent, you are welcome to test these methods, and feel free to share the successful results with us and with others. Know that there are NO "quick fixes" or 'overnight sensations' when it comes to making progress in communicating with teens. Regardless of their words or actions, your teens are listening to (and watching) the things you say and do. They really do value your beliefs and concerns, whether they tell you or not.

© 2011 Journey Girl
This information brought to you by:

Andrieka “AJ” Austin; Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org, voice of journeygirlatl.wordpress.com, Founder and Facilitator of Journey Girl, a mobile youth enrichment service for girls. Visit us online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org, enter your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails when new blog topics are posted.

Image: Note to Prents (screamfactorx.com)

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#STOP the Silence

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Tue, 12 Jul 2011 15:51:28 GMT

#STOP the Silence

I recently attended a most unique event/experience of a select few
inner city youth in Atlanta, GA. These were a group of 12 pre-selected
girls from around a community who had been personally hand-picked by a
local church to attend this once-in-a-lifetime kind of event. These
girls were invited to attend an event that had been specifically
planned and designed for them. One that would give them the experience
of a LIFEtime, and that also had an underlying message to help girls
who had been victims of child rape or molestation to #STOP the
Silence.

This event was all put together by a few leaders of an Atlanta-based
non-profit organization called Don't Ask, Just Tell
(www.dontaskjusttell.org). The ladies behind this vision have a GREAT
passion for inner-city youth, and channeling their VOICE on how to
SPEAK OUT and #STOP the Silence.

The girls were invited to a local hair salon, where they received a
FULL makeup (hair, outfit, shoes, customized jewelry, nails, catered
food, AND a limo ride home) and a chance to share parts of their
experiences with childhood rape and molestation in a supportive group
environment. HOW COOL! These ladies did not recognize that they were
in for SUCH a TREAT!

My contribution was to come out, show my support, hear the survival
stories of each of the ladies involved, and of course, share a bit of
my journey. To hear the this group of teen girls share the memories
and the horrifying details of such painful pasts and presents took
me by surprise. To see the tears and HEAR the hurt of those who had
survived such tragedy in their short time on this earth was absolutely
OVERwhelming. And to know that I could be so transparent and share my
story of victory gave each of us a dose of INspiration + HOPE! By the
time it was all over, we ALL needed a HUG! LOL .

I was so blessed to have been a part of an experience so unique
opportunity to "encourage...emPOWER...and entertain" the next
generation of phenomenal female leaders. I truly enjoy what I do, and
now having to share the JOY of the journey is what I LOVE the MOST about it all.

This event taught me to use the VOICE and the talent that God gave me
speak out, share encourage and empower...

© 2011 Journey Girl

This information brought to you by:

Andrieka "AJ"Austin: Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org,
voice of journeygirlatl.wordpress.com, Founder and Facilitator of
Journey Girl, a mobile youth enrichment service for girls. Visit us
online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based
enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for
bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at
www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org, enter
your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails
when new blog topics are posted.

The NEW book, "The Journey Girl Guide to Self-Empowerment;
Girl-friendly Tips, Tools, and Tidbits" is available for purchase
online Fall 2011 at www.journeygirl.org.

See Us Online:
www.facebook.com/journeygirlatlatlanta
ww.twitter.com/journeygirlatl
www.youtube.com/journeygirlatlanta

Photo Courtesy of Google Images: brucemctague.com

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#Freedom!

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Sat, 18 Jun 2011 21:08:51 GMT

I can remember having a curfew that meant being home before dark, and
wishing to have more freedom. One thing I learned is that having the
freedom to come and go as you please is a privilege (not a right) for
a teenager. I also learned that some privileges have to be EARNED.
Over time, as I showed more maturity, and commitment to my
responsibilities (chores, school work, homework, etc.) I began to earn
something called TRUST, which in turn lead to more FREEDOM. And
freedom turned out to be a GOOD thing!

My advice to parents/youth workers and leaders: keep in mind that
limits may sometimes=rebellion. Think of how BAD you want something
that you know you CAN'T have or that may not be good for you...makes
you want it even MORE, right?! Many times, we make the conscious
decision to go for it anyway, no matter the consequences. Well, the
same goes for our teens today. The more limited/"boxed in" they feel
they are becoming, the more they desire the FREEDOM. When it's
limited, it is sought after, begged for, and sometimes fought for
until obtained.

My advice to teens: as mentioned earlier, the freedom to come and go
as you please is NOT a right. This is something that can usually be
earned by showing self-discipline, respect, and maturity. Just make
sure that when it is extended to you, that you use it WISELY and don't
abuse it. Who knows, before long, you may have all the freedom you
need .

Â© 2011 Journey Girl

This information brought to you by:

Andrieka "AJ"Austin: Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org,
voice of journeygirlatl.wordpress.com, FounderÂ andÂ Facilitator of
Journey Girl, a mobile youth enrichment service for girls. Visit us
online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based
enrichment products and services. E-mail:Â bookings@journeygirl.org for
bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at
www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org,Â enter
your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails
when new blog topics are posted.

The NEW book, "The Journey Girl Guide to Self-Empowerment;
Girl-friendly Tips, Tools, and Tidbits" is available for purchase
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Teen Domestic Violence...another form of bullying

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Sun, 27 Mar 2011 22:33:00 GMT

Teen Domestic Violence...another form of bullying

I received an e-mail from a young lady in Opa Locka, Florida (a Senior in High School). She started a program to prevent Domestic Violence among teen girls in her school. She had witnessed girls suffering from mental, emotional, and physical abuse, and wanted to help them build up their self-esteem. She shared with me her story of growing up, seeing her mother deal with Domestic Violence on a daily basis, and how one encounter almost took her mother's LIFE. In her words, "I want teenage girls to come to the realization that they are BEAUTIFUL young girls, and they DO NOT need to be involved in controlling or abusive relationships to be happy." She shared that what she was asking of me was for a few Words Of Wisdom.

I also came across a quiz-type article in a magazine for teens that pointed out the ways for a teen to be able to tell if his/her relationship is HURTING them. The signs are as follows:

-Feeling unsafe with his/her partner
-Your partner puts his/her hands on you against your will
-Your partner calls you too often to see where you are, and who you are with
-Your partner gets jealous or upset when you spend time with others
-Your partner teases you or calls you names to grab your attention
-An argument springs up right after your partner has had a bad day
-After a fight, your partner showers you with gifts, compliments, and apologies
-Your partner has threatened you and/or your loved ones if you attempt to leave
-Your partner has pressured you into sex

If you've experienced any of these, and feel that you don't deserve better, this IS a sign that you are involved in an abuse relationship. If you are guilty of DOING any of these, you may be the abuser in the relationship, and should IMMEDIATELY seek help. The number to The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233 or call 1-800-787-3224. The National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline is 1-866-331-9474.

Important terms to know:

Physical Abuse - when someone physically injures you
Emotional Abuse - when someone teases you cruelly, puts you down, makes you feel insecure and unsafe
Sexual Abuse - when someone makes you engage in sexual acts against your will
Verbal Abuse - when someone uses negative, hurtful words and insults
Manipulate - when someone tries to trick you, or control you in a sneaky way

Current events like the domestic dispute between (rapper) Chris Brown and (singer) Rhianna is a perfectly clear example that teen dating/domestic violence is taking place in our society, and it does NOT matter WHO you are. Domestic violence is another form of extreme bullying, and this issue MUST be addressed among our teen girls who are dealing with it (especially on an on-going basis). Another incident in the media that show signs of extreme and severe bullying is that of the late Bobby Tillman, a High School-age teen that was recently stomped to death by a group of guys.

In the words of the teen from Florida, "WE can surely help to put an END to this type of violence." - MY WORDS EXACTLY!

My NEW book, "The Journey Girl Guide to Self-Empowerment; Girl-friendly Tips, Tools, and Tidbits" (released Spring 2011) includes a section that addresses the issue of bullying, and helpful advice on how to Stand Up!, and Face Your Bullies! Book available for purchase online on 4/1/2011 at www.journeygirl.org.

© 2011 Journey Girl

This information brought to you by:

Andrieka “AJ” Austin; Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org, voice of journeygirlatl.wordpress.com, Founder and Facilitator of Journey Girl, a mobile youth enrichment service for girls. Visit us online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org, enter your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails when new blog topics are posted.

Image: teen domestic violence (suescheffblog.com)
question/list source: Teen Voices Magazine, Vol. 18, Issue 2, Nov. 2009

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Graffiti...Gangs...and (Your) Teen(s)...

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Sun, 27 Mar 2011 03:52:00 GMT

While walking through a neighborhood recently, I noticed some graffiti writing in the middle of the street. I immediately thought to myself, "wow, do people STILL draw graffiti these days"?...Now this particular neighborhood was "nice", "quiet", and everyone pretty much kept to themselves. "So", I thought to myself, "WHY would someone(s) purposely target a street in an area like this?...unless, there is more to the story here.

Upon a little further research, I discovered that this may have been left-behind traces of an unruly group. This made me wonder if this could have been some type of gang-like activity (sometimes I am a little naive to things that are outside of 'my world'). As I continued to ponder on this, it made me realize that our teens are becoming more and more involved in troublesome behaviors and self-destructive affiliations.

My mother always said that life is FULL of C-H-O-I-C-E-S.
The current events in the news show young men (and women) spending countless years that equal MORE than the REST of their lives behind bars, because of the choices they made previously to join a gang. It saddens me to think that they will NEVER have the chance to re-consider their actions again.

On my way home, I came up with my own list of reasons why we are loosing our kids to "the streets", and violent activity. Maybe this list of reasons will reach at least one parent, Youth Leader, or even a teen who may be able to get through to a loved one, a close friend, or someone special to them and help them decide AGAINST joining a gang or making ANY potentially violent/harmful decision(s).

My list of why...
- a sense of belonging. He or she may not feel connected to his or her own family.

- this group may represent the ONLY thing they recognize as a sense of community.

- he or she may be BORED. Having nothing of interest to them to keep them busy, or to positively impact their time

- he or she may be trying to fit in, feel accepted as a part of a larger crowd.

- he or she may be HURTING, and searching for SOMEone who understands them.

- it MAY be a cry for help or attention that they may feel they are not getting at home.

- he or she may have a NEED for an authority-type figure, or someone to look up to in their life.

- he or she may want to be viewed as "cool", or stand out to their friends.

- his or her environment may not be very positive or productive, so they may choose what is "common" and available to them. Thus, falling into a stereotypical-type scenario.

- he or she may not feel that they have inner leadership instincts, so they may choose to follow the crowd (we were taught to ALWAYS be a leader...NEVER a follower)

- he or she may not be much of an independent thinker, so they allow others (and other things) to influence thier mindset and thought process.

I remembered reading an article in a Teen Voices Magazine on the realities of gang-life, and how a young 16-year old girl shared her story of how and why she joined a gang. Her story was very insiteful, and REAL. She mentioned that she was searching, trying to fill her need for someone to show her affection, and that they loved and cared for her. She wanted to be accepted, protected, and respected. She understood that many kids join gangs; believing that selling drugs, etc. would eventually fulfill their inner desire for "fancy"cars, and nice(r) clothes. She said that many feel that it is the ONLY way; not realizing the REALity of it all.

Gang violence and acceptance is a part of our society today. This issue is RARELY addressed (until someone is shot, injured, or death occurs as a result). My deepest belief is that the RIGHT decisions can be made in a teen's life, and it all starts with the RIGHT conversation. So, let's get talkin'.

© 2011 Journey Girl

This information brought to you by:

Andrieka “AJ” Austin; Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org, voice of journeygirlatl.wordpress.com, Founder and Facilitator of Journey Girl, a mobile youth enrichment service for girls. Visit us online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org, enter your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails when new blog topics are posted.

Image: graffiti (upwardcares.org)

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#Earthquake

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Mon, 14 Mar 2011 17:23:00 GMT

#Earthquake

In the wake of the most current events of the largest (8.9) earthquake, and the tsunami that measured over twenty foot waves in Japan, we must remember the children. It is understood that this day and series of events will go down in history, NEVER to be forgotten.

It recently dawned on me that amongst all the cars and houses that were destroyed, and may have drifted away with the ocean's strong currents and tides, there may have been children, big or small, yet unaccounted for amongst all the debris that was shown on television floating away.

What About the Children?!...

As parents, and Youth Leaders, we must now focus our strength on the grieving process for the families who may have lost their beloved little ones. Also, it's never too soon to explain God, natural disasters, or death to your child(ren). These are serious topics, and are often avoided in many households, but should never go unexplained to our youth.

The following list provides suggested ways for families to get through the grieving process and the loss of a loved one together to help keep them close in their hearts, while still keeping their memory alive.

1 - Create a scrapbook of of fun pictures of your oved one

2 - Listen to their favorite song, or create an online radio station of similar types of music (pandora.com is great for this type of activity)

3 - Donate your time and talents to starting a local charity, group, organization, or scholarship in his/her name

4 - Start a journal that lists all of the fun times that you can remember having together

5 - Cook his/her favorite meal, and share it with someone less fortunate

9 - Start a fund that supports the mission to help spread the word about what caused his or her death (it's what they would have wanted!)

The grieving process is never easy, and can take a very long time to make it through. This list is just to get you started on some ways that you can keep the memory of a lossed loved one alive (and are great for kids to get involved in too). Taking small steps, by doing something as simple as sharing your feelings (and listening to those of young ones), and taking action in the healing process will help you recover.

© 2011 Journey Girl

This information brought to you by:

Andrieka “AJ” Austin; Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org, voice of journeygirlatl.wordpress.com, Founder and Facilitator of Journey Girl, a mobile youth enrichment service for girls. Visit us online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org, enter your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails when new blog topics are posted.

Image: grieving family (upwardcares.org)

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7 Things that Your Child's Bus Driver May NEVER Tell You!

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Thu, 10 Mar 2011 22:36:00 GMT

7 Things that Your Child's Bus Driver may NEVER tell you:

1 - They are tired, have had a long day, and having to discipline your child while they drive a bus load of other screaming kids is nothing to look forward to

2 - They took this job to help feed their families, and look forward to the end of the school bus route to get back home to be with the ones they love

3 - They are often tempted to stop and turn the bus around out of frustration

4 - It's probably a good idea to ask them about the "Lost and Found" to check for items that your child may have left behind MONTHS ago

5 - Calling the school (or school board) to brag on what a good job they are doing at getting your child home on time would be AWESOME! (and may even motivate them to do an even better job)

6 - Seeing the SMILING faces and the friendly wave of a parent (or any caregiver) waiting patiently to receive their child getting off the bus just warms their heart, and brightens their day

7 - They have birthdays, job anniversaries, and celebrate holidays (which means they might like a gift during these special occasions)

These 7-things mentioned that your child's bus driver may NEVER tell you are being shared here to give parents, kids, youth leaders/workers, and caregivers alike some "food-for-thought". Feel free to share your list of additional tips, and comments.

© 2011 Journey Girl

This information brought to you by:

Andrieka “AJ” Austin; Teen Life Consultant, Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org, voice of journeygirlatl.wordpress.com, Founder and Facilitator of Journey Girl, a mobile youth enrichment service for girls, based in Atlanta, GA. Visit us online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

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Image: bus driver from webb.nmu.edu

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Fear vs Respect

aj@journeygirl.org (Journey Girl Atlanta) — Wed, 02 Mar 2011 03:53:00 GMT

Fear vs Respect

From recent years of professional experience in youth advocacy, I have
witnessed various situations of parent-child interaction, and must
say, that some things have caused me to go, "hmmm...". I often wonder
if parents who are raising teens (or children of any age) are aware
when or if their child is AFRAID of them, or if the child is acting out of pure
respect for their parent(s).

In my opinion, the word respect refers to a sense of honor and willing
submission to one who is in a position of authority. Even when one
disagrees with rules or 'orders', they are still carried out with
humility and respect.

Fear however, often refers to when one carries out an order or a rule
out of a sense of terror, or threat for his/her life or well-being.

Believe it or not, when a task or request is carried out in fear, one
may secretly be harboring negative feelings, or thoughts of a revolt
or rebellion in the near future.

So often, I witness children rebel against parents by doing drastic
things like acting out in school (by not doing their school
work, letting their grades slip, and/or getting into other kinds of
trouble), at home (by not completing chores or other simple requested
tasks) or even in secret (by doing things like cutting themselves or
attempting to hurt themselves or others).

Here are (4) ways to know if you're instilling FEAR into your child(ren):

1 - does your child(ren) jump or seem jumpy, edgy or nervous around you?

2 - is there a look of fear or disconnect in his/her eyes when you
talk to (or at) them?

3 - do you often YELL, curse/swear, or threaten to harm them if they
do not do what they're asked?

4 - do they secretly cry (aloud or softly) when alone or "wish they
were dead" (or not a part of your family)?

Here are (4) ways to know if your child trusts, and merely respects and admires you:

1 - he/she completely carries out tasks BEFORE they're even asked to do them

2 - he/she strives for perfection to make you happy or proud of them
at all times

3 - they consistently seek your approval and satisfaction, and asks for your advice or opinion OFTEN (because they want your respect too!)

4 - they tell you that they love, respect, and admire you often

And as a BONUS:
they do everything within their power to make and keep you happy.

There are parents who want their child(ren) to have BOTH fear and
respect embedded into their daily behavior. It's still a topic of
controversy between parents and youth advocates alike on which is
best.

Share your comments/ thoughts below:

© 2011 Journey Girl

This information brought to you by:

Andrieka “AJ” Austin; Teen Life Consultant, Speaker, Author, Editor of blog.journeygirl.org, voice of journeygirlatl.wordpress.com, Founder and Facilitator of Journey Girl, a mobile youth enrichment service for girls, based in Atlanta, GA. Visit us online at www.journeygirl.org for more information on our youth-based enrichment products and services. E-mail: bookings@journeygirl.org for bookings and speaking engagements.

Listen to the audio-recorded version of this blog post at www.journeygirlatl.wordpress.com.

Find Ms. Austin on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/therefurbisHER.

Did you enjoy this post? Subscribe now at blog.journeygirl.org, enter your primary email address and click "Subscribe" to receive e-mails when new blog topics are posted.

Image: Fear‑respect.jpg from gveronis.com

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